FRANK WU’s HANDY GUIDE TO WHAT SHOULD AND SHOULDN’T BE A BASEBALL CRIME
Misdeed
Wrong possibly despicable but NOT a crime
A misdeed punishable by ejection from the game
A crime against baseball punishable with a suspension / fine
A real crime punishable by jail and/or fine
To be adjudicated by
Baseball
Hall of Fame
Throwing a ball at a hitter
X
X
Throwing your fastest fastball at a guy’s head
X
X
X
Throwing your fastest fastball at a guy’s head when he’s not even in the batter’s box (1)
X
X
X
X
(HOFers don’t do this sort of thing)
Using a corked bat (2)
X
X
Having a 18-month affair and a baby with a Hooter’s girl (3)
X
X
Taking steroids (4)
X
X
Lying to Congress about taking steroids (“I didn’t do it”) (5)
X
Breaking up with Minka Kelly (6)
X
X
Punching out the opposing hitter (7)
X
X
Reaching into the stands to take a sure out away from Tony Tarasco and granting Jeter a home run he didn’t deserve (8)
Actually, kind of awesome.
Eating chicken and drinking beer while playing Xbox Live in the clubhouse during a game (9)
X
X
Catching a fly ball in your hat
Actually, kind of awesome.
Spitting on Cliff Lee’s wife
X
Playing cards in the clubhouse while your team is losing its final playoff game (10)
X
X
Just being a member of the Red Sox
X
Crying
X
X
X
X
(1) Ben Christensen (most loathsome and abominable man to ever play baseball)
(2) Sammy Sosa
(3) Chipper Jones
(4) Too many to list
(5) Roger Clemens
(6) Derek Jeter
(7) Nolan Ryan
(8) Jeffrey Maier
(9) Josh Beckett et al.
(10) Ricky Henderson
Here's a question:
Hall of Fame balloting is based on these criteria: Voting shall be based upon the player’s record, playing ability, integrity, sportsmanship, character, and contributions to the team(s) on which the player played. (emphasis added)
Many voters will not vote for plays because they used steroids. But what about a player like Chipper Jones, with unquestionable Hall of Fame numbers, but who had a 18-month affair and a baby with a Hooters waitress? Does character count? Should that keep him out of the Hall of Fame?
IMO batters taking steroids is/was NOT a crime when it was [a] not against the given rules of baseball at the time AND [b] pitchers were commonly taking uppers/speed to juice their pitching [and are still doing so, since it's not being tested for]. I -liked- the high score games this engendered & feel it helped baseball regain popularity after the bedarned baseball strike. People whining about it -now- were enjoying it -then- & are being whine-monsters. Again, YMMV, but I got sucked into baseball during that time & likely would not have, had it not been for the excitement.
I have to agree with you. I guess what I meant was that, now, under the current rules, it seems appropriate that taking a substance specifically banned should get you a suspension.
Totally true that when Mark McGwire was, rather openly, taking steroid-like compounds, they were totally legal. It seems wrong to punish players for taking things which were legal at the time. It's as if tomorrow they suddenly based a law making, say, I dunno, beer, totally illegal. And then they went back and punished you tomorrow for beers you drank last year when beer was still legal. Doesn't seem quite right.
Good point, Lenora. If he'd had an affair with a starlet, yup, it would be just as bad.
Or maybe not. Your comment made me think about this.
I think one of the reasons the "Hooters girl" part gets me is that it seems a lot more like sexual harassment, because there's a power differential between a rich and famous baseball player and someone who's unknown and probably not making much more than a couple times minimum wage. That power differential wouldn't be there if he was fooling around with someone else who was just as rich and famous.
Then, again, I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. But it certainly helps the reader imagine the situation in his/her mind.
frankwu
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